I Wish….

I was making my rounds the other day and had to pickup a hustler’s necessity. A lot of people claim they gettin money but don’t have one of these in their possession. As you can see it’s a pen to detect counterfeit bills but as usual with my over active brain I began wondering something. What if they made a counterfeit pen for people? Do you know how much time and energy I would save and how much more productive I could be? Imagine just walking up on somebody and using the pen on them to see what their pedigree is. If they were real their skin would turn blue on contact but if they were CB4 their skin would turn hot pink. My world would become a utopia in an instant if a pen could detect deceit, envy and general b**chassness in a matter of milliseconds. If this pen existed alot these nagas runnin round claiming they real would go into exile for fear of being exposed. Rap would change overnight and nagas would rap about normal things not some overblown drug capers. Imagine nagas fessin up to bein petty dealers that never copped more than a bounce at a time. All politicians from student council government to the federal reserve would have to walk round with vests on and a secret service detail at all times and live in underground bunkers for fear of retribution from their constituency.

The bulletproof pope mobile would be their only means of transportation to and from their random acts of f**kery. The fake booty epidemic sweeping the urban wilderness would come to a grinding halt. Imagine rollin up on a girl with two basketballs on her back and swiping the pen on her. When it turns pink you can let out a laugh so hearty that no therapist will be able to ever remove that sound and leave her self esteem shattered until her last breath. Imagine how many simps would become empowered and a cause a disturbance in the friendzone matrix. The restaurant industry would be on the verge of a meltdown because women would stop gettin free meals from clowns they have no interest in. There would be alot less fatherless children running around here and the child support system would crumble before our very eyes. So much f**kery in this world would cease if a pen like that really existed. It would force honesty which is the ultimate catalyst to progress in the long run. Only through harsh honesty does any lasting change cement itself. I wish I could shut my brain off; but more importantly I wish someone would invent that damn pen already. You know what scratch that. I think I have found my life’s calling. Coming soon to a hood near you. Deuces.

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